How to get your INNER PEACE back (when outside influences are threatening your zen)

How to get your INNER PEACE back (when outside influences are threatening your zen)

Ahh!! This quote from the Dalai Lama just hit home for me today! I confess that although I meditate everyday and professionally help people to find their inner peace on a daily basis, I still have a day here and there where someone’s behavior throws me for a loop. I even noticed this theme pop up with a lot of my clients in the past week. My clients were experiencing teachers, parents and romantic partners’ negative moods or hurtful behavior causing a tremendous detriment to their state of mind and the inner peace they’ve been working on creating.Too often we work on cultivating this beautiful inner garden, we bring the sunshine each day through our healthy habits and spiritual practice and then all of a sudden it feels like a force of nature, hurricane or tornado comes (in the form of someone’s else behavior towards us) and wreaks havoc on our beautiful patch of heaven, leaving us feeling empty and confused! Can you relate?

So for me when this happens, I instantly notice that I’ve moved out of my place of love and I’m not connecting with my higher self. As soon as I go to into that stressed, anxious, uncomfortable and unfamiliar place, it’s a wake up call. The longer I allow myself to stay in that place, the more exhausted, drained and achey I get, so I immediately take action. What does that look like?

Well first off: STOP. DROP. MEDITATE.

I have this simple meditation for letting go that you can try in a jiffy or even this one for finding PEACE now that I rely on a lot when I’m out and about and don’t have the luxury of my own space at home. I also love to do the kundalini meditation for irrationality (I teach it in my mindful eating + meditation class) video.

second, break out the ACIM!

A Course in Miracles says,” Everything is either love or a call for love.” So when someone is behaving cruel or negatively towards you and it’s definitely NOT love, it’s a desperate plea for love from them. When you take a minute to really see this person you’re dealing with from a total place of innocence, you can see how entangled in fear they are to act the way they are behaving. Yogi Bhajan said one of the sutras of the Aquarian age was,” understand through compassion or your misunderstand the times.” and it’s in moments of this frustration that I think back on his wise words and turn my head and my heart to compassion.


That’s right, give it up! Give it up to God, the universe, your dead pet, whoever you like to pray to / talk to / ask for advice. Say a little prayer and place the situation fully in their hands, ASK for the miracle, ASK to see things differently and then allow yourself to sit back and be guided. I like to say ” Dear God, please take – this situation – , I place it in your hands, please handle ALL the details, heal my mind of error and show me what you would have me do, Amen.” But you can phrase it however you like, just give it up, surrender the situation and stand in the willingness to shift your perception and experience a miracle.

and LASTLY..

know when to call in reinforcements.

This is where myself or your spiritual running buddy may need to intervene. Sometimes we can get so overwhelmed with emotion, stuck in the victim zone and held hostage by fear. This is where you call in the troops!! It’s a beautiful thing to be self-aware enough to know that you can not dig yourself out of the hole alone. My clients will send me an email in these situations or schedule an emergency call, and many of my girlfriends call and ask for “emergen-zen” sessions now. The “emergen-zen” session was actually born out of this situation with my girlfriends, a guy they were dating or a family member would put them in the hurt box and they would spiral into the fear zone and need an emergency appointment where we would talk about what was going down, I’d shed some light on their situation and help them flip their perspective and then guide them through a meditation and help them surrender it. They left feeling relieved, renewed and ready to get back to being their best selves and really encouraged me to start offering it publicly.

As a special bonus to those of you who resonated with the message in this quote and blog post this evening, I’m offering a SPECIAL DISCOUNT on my emergen-zen session for those of you who email me with “I READ THE BLOG!” in the subject line. :)

I will give you almost 50% off the price of a regular emergen-zen, so you will pay only $111 for the 90 minute intensive session! We’ll talk about what’s going on with you right now, help you gain clarity on the situation and I’ll personally guide you through a customized routine of different meditations allowing you to surrender the situation, let it go and create the space for a miracle. You’ll also leave with the recording of your personal guided meditations and a game plan on how to keep your zen going! If this sounds perfect for you or someone you know – feel free to email me at with “I READ THE BLOG!” in the subject line and we’ll get you scheduled ASAP!